Queen Merlene shares her journey as a mother
Devrone Connor is an open minded and engaging young man. He is a brilliant conversationalist and his warm spirit is captivating. If you do not know him personally or if no one tells you, you will be unaware that he was born with the inability to walk. He doesn’t let it define who is and what he has to offer to the world. He is a graduate of the Clarence Fitzroy Bryant College with an Associate of Arts in General Studies.
Devrone’s self-assurance stems from the fact that he comes from a loving family and was raised by a powerful mother. At this moment, there is no one I can think of that epitomizes the theme “Resilience” more than Devrone Connor’s mom, Merlene Connor. As a woman, we all have our challenges. It does not matter where on the globe you are located. However, if we’re honest with ourselves we will realise how childish we have been in our whining and immature in our thinking as we parade in our cloaks of defeatism as if it’s Joseph’s coat of many colours.
We’re ready to quit at the least sign of something happening that is contrary to what we had planned. It drizzled instead of the sun warming our face. We call our boss to say we’ll be late. Or we may take the day off. After all, the drizzle may turn into a heavy downpour and the heavy downpour may turn into a hurricane that no weather forecaster had seen coming. If we look outside, we’d notice that the ground hardly looks wet as the shower was so light. We like to exaggerate things.
We failed a course, that we studied for many years. Instead of doing it again, we tell ourselves it is not worth it. Why resit a two-hour exam when we can lament for the rest of our lives that we spent three years studying and the entire universe conspired to see us fail? Lamenting is a famous past time for many. The time lamenting could have been better spent preparing. We complain that we were stuck in traffic for 5 minutes! Five long minutes!!! We never stop to thank God that we are alive. The people who had the accident, so wished they were stuck in five-minute traffic to prevent the accident.
We even complain about even having nothing to complain about. Having the ability to walk in the highest stilettos, like the fashion models doesn’t mean we are necessarily equipped to walk in another woman’s shoes.
Throughout the years, Merlene or Merle as she’s affectionately known, has been Devrone’s source of transportation; from her protective arms, to her shoulder whilst he attended primary school. As he is older she carries him on her back.
When Devrone attended high school and the C.F.B College, Merle travelled with him on her back, lifted him in the bus and lifted him out when they would arrive at their destination many miles later. At both high school and college was a wheelchair which Devrone used to transport himself around the. She would go to work at a nursery and after working hours she would repeat the process. So, every working day, she did this in the morning and in the afternoon. Merlene has other children and has been doing this for over 20 years.
Their home is not on the main road but approximately two hundred yards which is about 600 feet from the bus route. It is impractical to use a wheel chair as Merle has to step on stones along the journey. When it rains, there is a constant flow of water. Failing or falling is not an option. She would make her way uphill and climb the steps to get to the bus stop. Devrone has since competed his studies at CFBC.
In January 2017, Devrone Connor won a car in the KFC raffle. The country was in jubilation. It was like declaring that the country had placed in the Olympics.
Perhaps you may wonder why Merle is not on the cover of the magazine. It’s because she is not looking to be noticed for something she views as part of her motherly duty. In a world where we are quick to post every tiny detail that happens on social media, it takes a strong black woman to inspire so many lives though living a private and humble existence.
There are five traits that I wish to highlight about resilient people.
Sense of purpose
To be resilient you must have a driving force that compels you to do what you do. For Merle, it was ensuring that Devrone received an education and be the best person he can possible be.
Determination
Determination is another trait of resilient individuals. There is always a way out and no matter what, they persist until they meet their goals.
Content
Defined, content is a state of peaceful happiness and satisfaction. We have to be content first with what life has given us and then we will be more appreciative when we become blessed. Why should God bestow gifts to us when we complain about everything he has already done for us?
Learn to be content and keep striving until you achieve your goals. Contentment does not mean that you should not have goals. It means that as you elevate, you should still cultivate a state of happiness. You should not have to wait until you achieve something, for you to be happy.
Self-reliant
Resilient people are self-reliant. They do what is necessary to get things done rather than waiting for someone to do it for them.
Confidence
Resilient women are comfortable in their own skin. The reason we don’t elevate is because we are busy trying to be like someone else.
These five characteristics are what Merlene Connor displays. She has passed these traits to her son. In honour of International Women’s Day, I preferred to have Devrone share his life experiences of having a mother like Merlene.
Join me wherever you are in to commit from today to:
- have a sense of purpose
- be more determined
- be content
- be more self-reliant and
- be confident
Our cover model reflects how you can be feminine but still be resilient with you hand held high victoriously; how you can be content and close your eyes in reverence to God for all that he has done for you; how to be self-reliant with your feet firmly placed on the ground; and how to be gorgeous in your skin with confidence.
You do NOT need to be cloaked with the finest silk and fabric to have these traits. You can have a modest wardrobe and still be absolutely stunning. Your character has more value, than clothes.
The word “Nurture” is partly hidden as a woman does not need to tell the entire world how caring she is. It’s part of our DNA. Some women neglect their offspring when they should be more caring. If you are one, it is time to change.
You do not need to tell the entire world you are a Queen to be one or act like one. Merlene Connor has been wearing her crown for years, wrapped in robes of happiness and hope. There is much we can learn from Queen Merlene.
We salute you Queen Merlene for the lessons you have taught your son Prince Devrone and the entire world.
Article first published in Caribbean Vybes Magazine – Resilience Theme
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